Laguna Honda Hospital Resident

Laguna Honda Hospital Resident

Tuesday, December 31, 2013


---There are over 8 biliion people on the planet…now. The numbers are rising with virtually NO end in sight. This is very alarming in itself. But, what boils my bobcat is that we seem to take our cues from one another and see our one another’s expense.

---We compete + compare ourselves with each other to see how we’re doing. If someone seems to be having a tougher time than we are…we see that as some kind of sign that we are doing okay. When another seems to be doing better we can’t wait to tear him down to size. We don’t seem to live and let live very well. This is NOT a recipe for happiness.

---When was the last time we were TRULY glad over someone’s success? It was probably not that long ago. But, it doesn’t usually take TOO long when we are finding fault with that same individual. We end up resenting any further success he may have. We are all good at being armchair quarterbacks for the rest of us. (This applies to me, also.)

---We ALL seem to be expert on living each other’s life. We praise when it serves our purpose and criticize unmercifully to show off our astuteness, power or whatever.

---I see as a solution to ALL this is to become an ‘’armchair quarterback’’ to ourselves. See ourselves with the same eyes that we use on others. Take our own advice. Take the advice you would give to 5 folks close to you…and turn it on yourself. See your own game through those same critical eyes that you freely share behind the backs of those closest to you.

---Be good to yourself in this process. This may be NEW to you. Honestly…any pain you encounter is short-lived compared to the freedom you eventually experience. It literally is getting that ‘’monkey off your back’’ for good. You will no longer be snarky + sarcastic and NOW work for the common good. You will genuinely be happy at another’s success. You may realize that you have become a team player who actually benefit’s + likes the success of another. You have rejoined the land of the living in some sense. Use it wisely. This is much more a recipe for happiness. Be Well.


Sunday, December 29, 2013

PERSPECTIVES - (let's take a step backwards)

(Watch Awhile)
---The next time that we're having a hissy fit over something that we think is really important...maybe we should step back a bit.


Tuesday, December 24, 2013


---Here is a Holiday Message that I made a few years ago.

Friday, December 20, 2013

The most important lesson from 83,000 brain scans: Daniel Amen at TEDxOr...

Dr. Daniel Amen - ''Brainwash Cafe''
---Dr. Daniel Amen does another sensational TEDtalk. I find these kinds of talks very interesting.
If you are finding yourself wanting to hear more from Dr. Amen...go to website -''Brainwash Cafe''

Friday, December 13, 2013


Why LIFE Doesn’t Work

---The reason life doesn’t work as it seems it should…is so obvious that I have missed it for years. People are usually self-interested and still have the EGO mixed into the growth process. Other interested is in SECOND PLACE. Those who seem ‘’other-oriented’’ are many times doing it for incorrect reasons and are trying to find their niche in this society. Both ways need some tweaking in my way of seeing things.

---THE REAL problem is not whether one is self-concerned or other-oriented. I THINK THAT ‘’ONE SHOULD BE DOING THE THINGS HE IS GEARED TO DO THAT WILL HAVE HIM REACH HIS OWN POTENTIAL. THESE WILL…IN TURN, HAVE A POSITIVE AFFECT ON ALL.’’ He or she would be better suited to do those things that are an honest expression of who he or she is. That helps others in their own quest. BUT...That takes a great deal of knowing who oneself is.

---We then see that a life of knowing oneself is extremely important. It is very important to be honest about every little thing that one does. A growth pattern in this is usually where one goes from doing an autopsy of sorts on everything he does to growing to a ‘’natural spontaneity’’ of self-expression.

---Ideally…we can easily say that one does EVERYTHING because of love, but, when scrutinized a bit more closely… one may see where it is time to peal the onion and/or weed the garden, again…to be a little more honest. All that has been said, here…is geared to each individual reaching the highest and truest of himself and of ALL life.

Knowing That - ''it is okay to be who you are, usually, gives folks the strength to take the next step (in life.)''

Saturday, November 30, 2013

The Vivian J Lamb Lecture Series: Dr. Victoria Sweet

---Laguna Honda Hospital - ''was the pet of San Francisco''
Dr. Victoria Sweet lecture at Villanova University. She repeats some material, but goes a bit deeper at times. She mentions that we need to take back healthcare in someway. I, personally, see things in a way that should include the recipient as a viable the mix. A set of questions should be devised that his (the patient's) answers reveal his (the patient) true feeling(s) on the subject. I came upon the scene in 2002 when LHH was in the firm grasp of a DPH machine that had most of the movement of the nursing + administation office done. The rays of sunshine that I felt with Lumetra,  David Farrell and the EDEN ALTERNATIVE...were easily trampled by the running of the hospital as a business where we found that resident-centered care was easily trumped by budget-centered care.

Wednesday, November 27, 2013


---The video will speak for itself. I think the message is extremely important. It, personally, gives me much hope in the future...and gives me much hope and understanding in the tweaking of the Computer Club.

Grandmother Method
---The Grandmother Method was very important in my own development in life. And...I see what its absence can do. If the encouragement is NOT can easily result in very listless human beings held in check by each others' idle gossip. Folks become very concerned with appearance and let life pass them by.
---The ''Grandmother Method'' (GM) is like your personal cheering section that appropriately responds to what you do... encouraging you to take that next step. It has the knack saying the right thing when it is fitting. It, also, spurs the Life-Force be very vital in your life. It has a way of being extremely unconditional.

---Though unflatteringly named...The GM is the method Bobby D., used when he ''semi-unwittingly (maybe)'' was my cheering section. He got me to live life instead of allowing life to pass me by. We formed the Bobby Darling Show and now had direction where there was none. (That 'tweak' would probably come from somewhere, but Bobby was a catalyst for me.)
---Enough about my details. Kudos to what I see as an important TEDtalk. A GREAT VIDEO.

Official Bobby Darling Website

Paul H. Bobby D., blog



Saturday, November 9, 2013


This Video is A MUST SEE

---Here is a state that isn’t spoken of very often…but, has a very attracting quality to young and old, alike. It is the state of amazement that is attained when one is shown something he didn’t know existed or was even possible. But, it is curiousity or FEAR that usually debunks and demystifies it. It is usually ‘’FEAR’’ that is the underlying emotion. Some of us aren’t too cool about NOT ‘’getting’’ it.

 ---I’m speaking of the state of mind that one experiences when shown something NEW he is NOT aware of - but strongly responds to. It’s when the impossible is made possible. In a magic trick it happens often. It usually asks the question ‘’how did he do that?’’ or ‘’how was that done?’’

 ---Similar states of mind occur when one is told a joke where the train of thought suddenly veers somewhere unexpected. One is pleasantly sidetracked from his own logic and taken elsewhere. It can happen easily...but suddenly.  The response is for all intents and purposes - AUTOMATIC. It can be amazement at a piece of magic. The uncontrolled laughter at a joke. The appreciation of an insight or the ‘’insight’’ itself. A Zen Koan is geared to bring an individual to precisely the same place. Everything can stop for a moment. It can become the space between the breath - the VOID.

 ---''Wonderment - CAN BE - Wonderful.''

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

The Space Between Self-Esteem and Self Compassion: Kristin Neff at TEDxC...

---This talk should corroborate much of what you have heard before. It definitely promotes healing.

Monday, October 21, 2013

Healing Planet Earth!

What’s This ABOUT

Healing Planet



---The question comes from the fact that I stated that SINCE TERRY BECKER was healed through the application of SLOW MEDICINE (''God's Hotel'' by Dr. Victoria Sweet*) - Doesn’t Planet Earth fall into that same category? The answer is still YES!

---BUT…I, also, said that basically our ‘’job’’ is to let it happen. We can watch it ALL happen if we want…but, there is a good chance that we will want to participate. Well - there is something beyond just being passive and watching…that we can do.

---We must realize that we are part of the healing process when we do positive things…ALSO. If we get healthier (or MORE WELL) in the process it is being on purpose with the general healing. WE ARE DOING OUR PART!

 ---Stop being negative about everything. Realize that the more honest and positive we can be…ADDS to the outcome. Let our priority be cheering each other on and up and NOT just saving face and worrying about how we look. Take babysteps until we are familiar with ALL this. Find your own pace. Make it a fun and an enjoyable ride for one another and I guarantee we will have fun…also. Be Well.

* The Life-Force or viriditas does the healing as it did on Terry Becker.

Sunday, October 13, 2013

Dr. Sweet (God's Hotel) Recommended Him:


---I remember talking to Dr. Sweet - in the old building - about the amount of content that YouTube seems to have. She said she thought I would enjoy TAYLOR MALI and his material. Give a listen. You may enjoy him, also. I think he is astounding!

Thursday, October 10, 2013


Terry Becker AND Planet Earth:

---We must now realize that Terry Becker is much the same as Planet earth. BUT…why do we say this? We must realize that the same SLOW MEDICINE that healed Terry Becker will also work on healing Planet Earth. The only ‘’job’’ that we have in the process is…to ALLOW it to happen. We must put Planet Earth in the same condition of WELLNESS as Dr. Sweet placed Terry Becker and watch. Remember: a cut or a wound will heal if we let it.

---We have heard it put very eloquently by Dr. Victoria Sweet. The near fatal bedsore of Terry Becker was healed when NOT interfered with by anyone/anything. It took some time, but in an increasing manner the sore of Terry Becker healed.

---Terry has MUCH in common with our own - Planet Earth. It is also in need of a healing. And…the viriditas, the life-force, the god-force, etc., and so on…is right there ready, willing and able to do the same job that it did on Terry Becker - if we let it (and DON’T INTERFERE.)

---If we apply this SLOW MEDICINE to Planet Earth AND allow it to do it’s thing…a healing will take place. Once again…we have to let it. We must exercise patience and re-learn many things that promotes this condition. It can be seen as delicate as a pregnant woman giving birth to a ‘’newly-healed-self.’’ The recipe is right there…we just have to eliminate what does NOT promote healing. Take Care.

Wednesday, October 9, 2013


OVERVIEW from Planetary Collective on Vimeo.
---We are ALL in this together. We must realize we have a common destiny and take care of the environment as it has taken care of us for so long. We have ALL gone through some kind of shift that makes us realize that we are on a team that rehabs the players and the field that we are playing on...if we act accordingly. As with the idea of will accomplish this if we let it.

Tuesday, October 8, 2013


 The Value of FUN

---Having fun is very important when it comes to being healthy. A good attitude is very important to our wellbeing, and here is the kicker…NO matter what condition we find ourselves. How we see life…has much to do with the way we handle whatever it may be that we happen to be saddled with.

---This recipe depends much on how we envision ourselves. If we take everything personally and find we are serious most of the time…we are probably uptight and restrict our own freedoms in someway. We are not spontaneous much of the time and feel like we are in check by someone or something. Or, it could be the other side of the coin where we need to control the way others act. We don’t allow them to be very spontaneous.

---Taking things in stride is a must for good health. If we find we DON’T get bent out of shape over everything, we probably do better in the blood pressure department. Keeping stress to a minimum works to our benefit. Remember that we usually get angry when life doesn’t turn out like we think it should. Relaxing on that whole process is a good thing.

---Doing things we enjoy is a big key to happiness. You only have so many waking hours each day…why not fill them with things that you like. Remember that a good attitude always feeds in positively to your health. Upgrade your happiness if necessary. If you find that the only fun you have is at someone’s expense…maybe work on that. The benefits to yourself and others will be appreciated and you will improve your health in the process. Have Fun.


Thursday, September 26, 2013


Always Ask, Never Assume!!
---His request approved, this CNN News photographer quickly used a cell phone to charter a flight at a local airport. He was told that a twin engine plane would be waiting for him.

---Arriving at the airfield, he saw a plane warming up outside of a hanger. He jumped in with his bag, slammed the door shut, and shouted, ‘’let’s go.’’

---The pilot taxied out, swung the plane into the wind and took off. Once in the air, the photographer instructed the pilot, ‘’Fly over the valley and make low passes so I can take pictures of the fire on the hillsides.’’

---’’Why?’’ asked the pilot.

---’’I’m a photographer for CNN and I need to get some close up shots.’’

---The pilot was strangely silent for a moment. He finally stammered, ‘’So what you’re telling me is…you are NOT my flight instructor?’’

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Saturday, September 14, 2013


The ''I Hate BOB,'' Story

---‘’I hate Bob.‘’ When we say that we hate someone…what (and who) is it that we are talking about? I would like to take a closer look at this. When we say this…I’d like to say that we are NOT accurate.

---’’I hate Bob.’’ Am I saying that I hate Bob OR, am I saying that I hate the way Bob acts. I hate the way Bob behaves. I may hate Bob’s attitude. I may hate Bob’s value system. But…when push comes to shove - I probably do NOT hate Bob.

---Actually, do I even know Bob, behind the ways he presents himself? I would say probably NOT. I would have to say that Bob is the being, the blank slate, that has these different values, attitudes and behaviors that I pin to him. I call this husk ‘’Bob’’ if you will.

---The funny thing about this is that Bob is different, dependent upon who you ask. Bob’s mother sees him different than his dad. His worst enemy sees him much different than his best friend. I asked his girl friend. I asked his preacher. Everyone I ask has a little different interpretation than each other…AND myself. Sometimes it gets so far out that I have to remind myself that it is the Bob that I know.

---If we look at the values, attitudes and behaviors by themselves we see that they are like coats we put on and take off. We see that ALL of us are pretty much ‘’naked’’ dressed in different values, attitudes and behaviors that make up the personality of this thing we call Bob, Jim, Mary and Karin. And sometimes - Paul.

---Any good psychologist will tell you that we are like an ONION that peels away one layer at a time. Eventually, usually after much peeling…we get to the heart of the matter.

---Bob is peeling, as we both are…as we ALL are. Actually, Bob has some pretty neat attitudes and behaviors that I find ‘’fun’’ and ‘’enjoyable’’ when we talk about computers. He has a way of putting the coats on and interpreting them that happens to educate and entertain me. Hanging with him all-of-the-time would be a little much. But, as a ‘’dressed husk’’ in small doses…we laugh a lot. Take Care.
WELLNESS can be the Value, Attitude and Behavior. It can easily be the motivation of ALL three.


Thursday, September 12, 2013



---We have the real reason why WELLNESS can breed unhappiness. It is simply this: The person does NOT allow the healing to happen. He is (many times) getting in the way by still ‘’scratching’’ the poison ivy infection and wondering why the infection isn’t cured. The person has to endure the ‘’unhappy’’ times of NOT scratching the itch. (Withdrawal)

---It really comes down to ones experience of love and the amount of conditions that it has on it. If a person feels empty inside he may try to fill it with something that has a ‘’good feeling’’ associated with it, but truly only masks the emptiness that one feels. One tries to use this product as a substitute for feeling loved and appreciated in an unconditional way…but it NEVER does the trick. All it does is leave the individual addicted to trying to recreate the ‘’good feeling’’ he had - realizing that even the good feeling only shows up occasionally…and that is if he is lucky.

---Wellness will work and healing happens when allowed. What will NEVER work is the addiction to the substitute or commitment to the product one has been using…instead of filling-up with love and things of the heart which were missing in the first place. When one is loving…he will be loved and he will feel it. Until that happens, he may involve himself in many different ways that promises to work once you get the formula down for using it. It WILL NOT WORK IN THE LONGRUN and leads one down a path of sheer dissappointment. Addictions, etc., are only a short-run fix. Love and things of the heart are in this for the longrun and are EVERLASTING.

---When addiction is worked-out + allowed to heal and the ‘’happy’’ phoenix is then able to fly…we have a glorious day indeed. But, be kind to yourself by knowing this – we have many crutches and dependencies, many needs and preferences that have insinuated themselves into our lives. Stay true to the path and find the lifestyle that emerges from all this. Make it more your routine than the old more destructive lifestyle. Watch the benefits that come from a life well-lived. The word satisfaction will make sense. can be a big part of your everyday routine, because it is allowed to blossom - all because you decided to take stock in things. REMEMBER that it is still one day at a time, but now they are quality days. That makes all the difference. Be Well.


Tuesday, September 10, 2013



HAPPINESS (necessarily)

---Wellness does not necessarily mean that you have everything that you may want. We have to look at this more closely. As an example...we will use smoking. In the 1950's...society was encouraged to smoke. We were told that anything negative that come from smoking was just that – negligible. We were told that 4 out of 5 doctors – smoked. It was all over TV and movies, restaurants and buses, etc. Anywhere people were...smoking was!
---Over the years society has wised-up. Not everyone at the same rate, but, after many years of wreaking havoc on many things – we realize that we all have to cut back on our desire systems...and that is for the very survival of our planet and ourselves. We learned that many things that we thought were making us happy had dire consequences and made us sick in the process. The side-effects that all things carry NOW wants to be dealt with. And, it is not allowing us to pass it on by passing the problem to someone else. It is taking root in our own backyards.

 ---Suddenly, we have become conscious of what the payback is to the kinds of things that we do. We have to weigh the happiness and wellness factors against each other. We see how important the choices we make are to promote what we want to see and be. We find that if we are concerned strictly with wellness we may have to relegate ourselves to NOT doing some or many of the things that we used to do that (we thought) made us happy. We can NO longer trade-off our health (planetary + individual) for many of the things that had promises of happiness. We, also, can't do well at the expense of another. If that is what you do you'll find that someone close to you will have objections to that...if NOT the person him/herself – someday soon. People will get pissed-off enough and say something where at onetime you were allowed more ''error space'' and got away with negative behavior more easily.

---We must find a lifestyle that we can live with...that has wellness and happiness built into it. NOT a trade-off situation where it is either ''happy'' OR ''wellness.'' We choose a lifestyle that what makes us HAPPY and is also GOOD FOR US. In my estimation, one isn't really well unless he is happy, also. I'm speaking of a sustained happy and NOT just fleeting moments of happy...every now and then. Your style of living allows for a well-rounded and healthy dose of well-being...all-or-most-of-the-time. Be Well.

Monday, September 9, 2013


Principle 8 Heard In Hill Hearing

By Chris Perna  on August 30, 2013

Principle Eight of The Eden Alternative basically says that decision-making authority should be in the hands of Elders or those closest to them. We know this results in the best person-directed care for the Elders.

Testimony at a recent public hearing held by the Congressional Commission on Long-Term Care supports our view. Experts testified about the importance of direct-care workers in providing quality care and the critical role that they play on interdisciplinary care teams because they are closest to the Elders.

While this revelation isn’t new to us, I’m glad that the people who set public policy and make regulations are hearing about reality. Let’s hope they take it into account as they make recommendations that could shape the future of long term care.
(Decision-Making is a very important part of the autonomy of the Elder no matter what position he may find himself.)

Friday, August 30, 2013

THE INNER + OUTER WORLD : Sir Ken Robinson

---Let's Learn To Rehabilitate The INNER WORLD of Another...and MAKE HIM WELL!

Tuesday, August 27, 2013


---If we see the term WELLNESS as synonymous with the Life-Force...we can use it to describe the healing the body naturally partakes in…on its’ journey to getting better. It is called many thIngs in many cultures (chi, prana, viriditas, the force, life-force, etc.,) but refers to the same ‘’THING.’’ We can call this force/dynamic - the WELLNESS.

---The healing of a wound or cut will happen if we let it. We, also, have broken limbs, allergic reactions, etc. All that the healer would do would be to remove whatever interferes with the healing (wellness) from taking place.

---The WELLNESS is allowed to do its’ thing…which is to increase the wellness of the organism. We allow the wellness to make us well. If one truly ‘’gets’’ this concept…then ONE really understands the whole of it. This may sound like wordplay, but, believe me…it is not. It is having a truly positive manner while accepting the INEVITABLE.

---Living on the hospice…the question of where WELLNESS stands on the life/death natural. It would be to die in peace…and not be tortured to the end. It is an accepting of life and death as part of what we do instead of setting up a resistance to it and constantly trying to ''thwart it'' to NOT allow it to happen. Many folks have much of there fear based on this…NOT realizing that this fear governs much of the choices that they make. Their quality of life would improve with an upgrade of attitude in this area. Be Well.

Monday, August 12, 2013



---If we have a canary in our charge to care for, we would be concerned with his food, water and condition of his cage. We would, basically, want the canary to be out of harm’s way - especially when the care of the canary is our responsibility.

---These are ALL very necessary things to be concerned about.

---If our concern was for the canary’s happiness…we would be sure that the bird had a chance to fly and sing. If the things of the first paragraph are not in place, then flying and singing are compromised.

---A well-rounded bird has everything in place…the basics and the things that make him happy. A well-rounded bird sings a happier tune than one who is NOT allowed to sing and fly.

---Where do we see our responsibility? An even worse scenario is a bird that doesn’t know he is able to fly and sing

Thursday, August 8, 2013



Another Good Example

---Today was a meeting of the Quality of Life-Performance Improvement Team (PIT). This is slated to improve the quality of life of the residency of which Frank and myself...belong. We have new leadership. I was VERY encouraged.

---Our blind, friend, Frank was in the spotlight, again. This time he had a book-on-tape (2 cassettes) and a borrowed cassette player. But he wasn’t shown what to do. He couldn’t make the whole thing work.

---A nurse that was present was going to help him, but she had to excuse herself for hospital business elsewhere. She has three blind relatives, so she seems to have, probably, been a good one to help.

RESIDENTOLOGY 101 is: To Enjoy Living - We Must Be Heard + Taken Seriously.

---The NEW group leader seemed to ‘’GET’’ the situation that I have been ''spouting'' which NOW seems for a very long time. I found this very encouraging. We, residents, in general...really don’t know how to hook into the system. Per usual, Frank got a lot of ‘’I don’t have time, now’’ from many of his helpers. We, residents, have a lot of unfulfilled preferences. The hospital is good on the medical side of things, but lacks equally on the relationship end.

---The nurse at the meeting would be a good example - as many - on the staff. They would help if they didn’t have something else that they are supposed to be doing. No one seems to have time. The irony of it all is that they don’t have time for Frank (resident), because they have to be elsewhere doing paperwork (or something of importance) to allegedly help somebody else...who is, also,  a resident. They become very inefficient in all this.

---If they started a new policy stating that each moment is a new moment and when in doubt the thing to do is to head to the nearest resident and get to know him or her (and maybe form some type of relationship.) I’m convinced that ALL folks would be much happier and benefit greatly. That includes both residents and staff. Take Care.

Monday, August 5, 2013





---We view Icebergs floating in the water, probably an ocean and very cold. The icebergs collect more ice and becomes more massive the colder the water. The opposite is true as the water becomes warmer. They become smaller.

---We see that each ''iceberg'' is different, having its own shape, size, height, depth, weight, etc. We see that each iceberg can really be distinguished from the other.

---We are like ''Icebergs.'' We have different characteristics. But, each ''iceberg'' is really only WATER. That is the Life Principle. It is the Love Principle,

---We are ALL made of the same stuff…just proportioned, differently. The LOVE ENERGY, the LIFE ENERGY is the water in the ''iceberg.'' This is the Chi, the prana, the ‘’’viriditas’’ that Hildegard of Bingen spoke about. It is The Prime Mover. The ‘’slow-medicine’’ that Dr. Victoria Sweet spoke of in her book ‘’God’s Hotel,’’ (about the old Laguna Honda Hospital where I lived.) The ‘’Life-Force,’’ viriditas or whatever we call it is the same in ALL of us. Some call it the God-Force.


In This Analogy - ''We Are The Icebergs, LIFE (Itself) Is The Water.''

Sunday, July 28, 2013




---During my time spent working in the ''helping'' profession, I was asked, ''What part of my story are clients interested in hearing?'' This question was seriously posed by one of the psychiatrists who sincerely wanted to know. My answer was not well thought out, at the time, and I wish to convey the following.

---Clients or Residents are not interested in your story unless it has some bearing on there own situation. By this, I mean, they want to know if the person in front of them (psychiatrist, ''CARE PARTNER'' or whathaveyou) is able to know what they, themselves (the resident/patient,) are going through. Will they be understood? So, the provider tells his story and communicates to the resident the amount that he knows of himself and of ''life in general,'' and the relationship between the two. .                                                                                                                
---The ''care partner'' brings his own understanding, from his arsenal made up of ''where he's been, his story, which leads to the 'care partners' own level of self-knowledge and his/her ability to communicate this.'' It must be remembered that each ''resident-care partner'' relationship has its own unique differences, so what works with one resident may or may not work with another.

---What always works is increasing the self-knowledge of the resident. We want to increase his ''arsenal,'' also. We can help him with his self-knowledge and how he sees ''life in general.'' We help with his communication skills and help him articulate how he sees his relationship to this ''vision'' of himself and his ''new'' situation.  We try to increase his relationship to his ''creative-self'' and his ''sense of oneness'' with all things and people, trying to increase his/her relationship with ''life in general'' and ''existence,'' Itself.

---We want to be sure we are not just passing along our own set of hang-ups and neuroses. So, when I say ''life in general,'' be very sure that your own ''vision'' is not tainted. That you see things and understand things ''clearly'' and you are basically happy and bring a sense of well-being to the table. Be honest with yourself and be responsible. Half-truths and misconceptions are not what the ''resident'' needs a whole lot more of. In fact, these very things, probably, have a lot to do with the reason why this person is seated before you. It surely has much to do with his ''Frustration.'' Be Well.

Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Saturday, July 20, 2013

''RESIDENTOLOGY 101'' - Frank's Dilemma


Frank's Dilemma


---Recently, Frank A., had a dilemma in his life. Frank, in case you don't know him, has a robust Irish brogue and a presence that fills a room. One of the  reasons that Frank is at Laguna Honda is that one day he acquired a fever, and lost his eyesight in the process.
''He's Blind''
---One of the ways that Frank communicates is in  writing notes to his friends. Frank's dilemma was one in that, being totally blind, the writing, itself, was hard to read. He would print in big, block letters trying to be clear, but as soon as the pen left the page, the problems would begin. Being blind, he would put the pen back where he thought it belonged, but it always was NOT in the correct spot. The reader ALWAYS found reading Frank's notes a challenge, at best. Even his children.

---Frank was determined to be heard along these lines. Writing notes and communicating his ideas, were very important to him. Thankfully, Frank was heard...and was hooked up with Occupational Therapy. Gina D., is his therapist. It took a little time, but, the improvement is there. The before-and-after of his writing is, comparatively, like day-and-night. It is so much clearer and easier to read. The squeaky wheel GOT its grease. It was ALL viable. Frank's onetime dilemma, is now a Real Success.  Frank was heard and taken seriously. He can, now, leave that frustration behind. He can, again, communicate with his notes. Frank + the Residents'/Patients' wish to congratulate Occupational Therapy and Gina D., for all their efforts. Thank you. Take Care.
(From the archives.)

Wednesday, July 10, 2013


Old Saying

---We can apply this old saying of Lao Tzu to what is now happening in our times and situation. We can substitute many things in the ‘’teach him to fish’’ part. It seems that making folks…’’self-reliant’’ is the call of the day. People without skills seem to be called to the wild.
---In our city…the NEW call seems to be much like the old TV show ‘’M*A*S*H’’ – patch him up quickly and send him back to the front lines. To make a long story short – many seem more equipped with psychological abilities to fight the Korean conflict then seem ready to do battle on the city streets.
---I’m proposing a plan to address both scenarios, simultaneously, that makes those involved to be ‘’better people’’ on ALL sides of the equation. That would be to teach skills and abilities that increase the person in his realization that he is alright to begin with and he doesn't need someway to escape into being drunk or stoned or anything else for that matter. 
---Through this idea of teaching people skills + abilities that are relevant to our present society and can then open the doors to increased learning on the subject if so desired.  1] Folks would then be more self-aware and know themselves better THEREFORE less likely to wage war in the first place. 2] Folks would be taught to fish (taught skills) that help tame ‘’a Call of the Wild’’ DOWN TO ‘’a Call to Deal With the Present...Successfully.’’
---I feel that a way to teach people to fish is to work with the decision-making skills. For years decisions were made for the resident (old + new hospital + living environment of both) depleting the resident/patients own decision-making abilities and skills in the meantime. Many folks are at LHH through addictions, excesses and other avoidable whatnot. Had they been taught which are the good berries to eat and which are poisonous berries…they, probably, would NOT have been here to begin with.
---I feel WE cannot strip folk of any decision-making skills that they may have had and send them out ill-prepared and naked…to face MANY or ANY of the newly evolving elements…as we see them today. I think a concerted effort to give the residents/patients some kind of skills and abilities makeover so he'll be better equipped to face what HE may face in the society at large. Any type of recitivism TOO SOON, just defeats the saving of money...that seems to be what we are trying to accomplish in the first place. Two negatives don’t make a positive in the way it is being done at our city. It JUST increases the negatives.

Sunday, July 7, 2013

''RESIDENTOLOGY 101'': Two Case Studies

Two Cases That Illustrate/Illuminate



---I have two separate scenarios that illustrate the dilemma I stated in ‘’RESIDENTOLOGY 101’’. It is the situation that says: To Enjoy Living – We MUST Be Heard + Taken Seriously. If we are not heard and taken seriously we spend most of our time trying to be heard and taken seriously. When we feel that both are in place, then we can get on with the business of enjoying living.

CASE 1.] A woman who has bouts with dementia was looking for the elevator. Though I don’t have privy to her chart, I know that she wanders at times and doesn’t find her way back to her room. I’m sure that keeping her away from the elevators is a good thing. An important piece is that it was July 5 (Friday) and a skeleton crew only opens essential parts of the hospital.
---The woman was aware of a regular appointment she has on most Fridays. It was canceled due to it being the 5th of July. She didn't know this. She wanted to go on the elevator to the appointment which had been canceled.
---She kept asking the duty nurse where the elevator was and she was always sent in a wrong direction due to her wandering history. The woman was becoming more labored, more frustrated and more confused in the process. I encountered her trying to find the elevator in my room. I said I’m heading there and noticed how out-of-breath she was. I was instructed not to show her the elevators and witnessed her being sent in the opposite direction.
(The Saving Grace)  She showed up at the nurses desk with a ZEN Volunteer…who listened to why she felt she had to find the elevator. The charge nurse reassured her that her appointment had been canceled and that she was becoming frantic for no real reason. She was told, but may have forgotten. One could see how relieved that she was at the news. She, finally, could relax. She could enjoy life, again…as she felt her situation had been heard and taken seriously.
CASE 2.] This is a scenario that involved me more directly. I was to have a floater on this particular day. My consistent care nurse had not come to work. The medication nurse was, also, not someone who I work with very often. Floaters, in general, do not know your routine and as far as rapport goes, you, the patient do not know their quirks and how they do things.
---I have been spending much time in bed, lately, dealing with potential bedsores gotten from spending too much time in one position in my wheelchair.
---I was informed by the medication nurse of how things are going to be and at what times they are going to take place. I mentioned how inefficiently things are being set up for me and according to her plan...I’ll be jumping in and out of bed (which isn’t easy for me to do) all morning. I said that if she would just hear me out…we can resolve this.
---I told her that when she feels it is her time to talk she finds it easy to dictate her way of seeing things to the resident/patient. She always has NO problem in telling him that it is his turn to listen. When the tables are turned and it is now, the patient' turn to talk…she immediately begins assuming and wants to end the conversation. I indicated that I didn’t feel that that is at all fair. I said that I do not always just blow smoke and have nothing of consequence to say. I then told her of times that would work better for me.
---We touched fists and I hope that we have a new respect...born this morning. I (somewhat) felt heard and taken seriously…and (somewhat) could then get on with living. I didn't spend the morning trying to figure a way to be heard and taken seriously by her…I felt that she in someway heard how I was feeling about it all (in a clear + calm manner) and I was in someway now freer from worrying about it. It seems that we have a longway to go, but some progress was made.

---From a RESIDENT'S PERSPECTIVE…I think that these are important points. I think that many times the resident/patient is not heard and taken seriously. He has a lot to say, but is very out of practice or simply never has told his story. And, the best that he has even makes MANY of the 99% avoid him. BUT…when this communication happens,  the resident/patient involved begins to grow and flourish. AND THINGS ARE CHANGING. I just hope that the fragile momentum he has...can withstand the nay saying that seems to come with most things. Be Well.