Friday, July 31, 2015
Wednesday, July 29, 2015
We All Have The Same Emotions -
Just Over Different Things
---This example should make this clear. A bunch of us are hungry - experiencing the same emotions - but we have different food items that will satisfy us. Bob may want pizza while Jim wants steak. Mary may want eggplant while Sue wants a salad.
---We can see from the example that though they are all hungry, different things push their buttons. Of course, there are times when you intersect with someone. Sometimes there is someone you intersect with on a regular basis and some people that never darken your door. Many relationships are based on this dynamic.
---Whether you be staff, resident or butcher, baker or candlestick maker…we are much the same with a set of different wants and preferences that makes us all a little different. This is why we can be the same…but, different, at the same time. Take Care.
Monday, July 27, 2015
---When we ''AFFIRM'' something, we are saying it is alright, it is okay. When we affirm someone we are also saying that the person is alright or okay. When we affirm someone and they feel it, we are actually telling them or even giving that person ''Permission'' to take his ''Next'' step.
---It is so easy to stagnate, to stay where we are without much growth in our lives. We go through the motions of living, but don't feel very ''Alive.'' Sometimes we need help in taking that next step. Sometimes we are not even sure there is a next step to take.
---There is a light at the end of every tunnel, even if at present we can't see it. As Elizabeth Kubler-Ross is accreditted for- There are 5 stages we ALL go through on the way to Accepting something. They are 1] DENIAL 2] ANGER 3] BARGAINING 4] DESPAIR and 5] ACCEPTANCE. She came upon these phases while searching for those things we have in-common when we grieve. These are the stages that bring the ''Light'' into focus.
---We ''Stagnate'' as we move along these lines. Sometimes we Deny so furtively, that we just stay ''Shallow.'' Sometimes we are just Angry, not even knowing what we are so pissed-off about, but just figure we are '''Angry'' people. In the Bargaining phase, we find ourselves even making deals, saying things like ''If you'll only get me through this, I'll do...[and it is usually something that we have been letting ''slide'' for awhile.]
---Despair is the last ugly step before Acceptance. It is very natural to not like this stage. We feel '' Helpless.'' We hate to feel this way. In Despair we know there is nothing we can do about our situation. We handle this the best we can. We suffer to the extent we are attached to a certain outcome. We have to let go of ALL this. We have to learn to ''Trust.'' We grieve for those parts of ''Ourselves'' that are ''Lost'' so as to make ourselves Whole again. We can than see that ''Light'' of Acceptance that has been alluding us all this time. The best way ''around'' something is to go through it.
---By ''Affirming'' each other, we allow the person to take that next step. We like to know that it is really okay to STAND where we STAND, and Affirmation brings ''OKAYNESS'' to the table. We sometimes get very scattered and are pulled in many different directions at once. Even at this spot, if we feel affimed, it gives us a place from which to take our next step. When We Are Ready. Affirm each other along the lines of the five stages above, giving others the courage to not ''Stagnate'' too long at any one spot, and watch him or her ''Walk'' into the ''Light'' of ''Acceptance or Self-Acceptance.'' Be Well.
Friday, July 17, 2015
Monday, July 13, 2015
Friday, July 10, 2015
Saturday, July 4, 2015
10 WAYS TO MAKE FOLKS FEEL GOOD
- Say Hi and use people's name. Use a nickname if it will work.
- Ask someone to teach you something.
- Compliment someone. Even if you don't like someone too much there must be something you can say.
- Listen and repeat back a little what they say. It shows you are listening. We are quick to give our opinion instead of just listening to what a person may say. Learn NOT immediately jump in with your opinion. Just listen.
- Understand what someone says. Put yourself in their position. Learn to really commiserate. People like it when someone 'gets' them.
- Sometime a smile puts someone more at ease.
- Remember their spouses name or hobby that they may have. It makes people feel special.
- Help people if they need it.
- Greet people like you are really glad to see them.
- Make an effort to redirect negative energy to positive.