Laguna Honda Hospital Resident

Laguna Honda Hospital Resident

Friday, July 15, 2016

FRUSTRATION to WELLNESS via KINDNESS!


FRUSTRATION to WELLNESS
 via KINDNESS!

---We begin by stating the three steps that folks seem to go through during their hospital stay. 1] Frustration Stage, 2] Kindness Stage and 3] The Wellness Stage. The Kindness Stage should, without-a-doubt… be going on continually. This is the ATTITUDE that should run the whole show as we decrease Frustration and hence increase Wellness. 

---We see that FRUSTRATION is a big one in our society and where this begins for most of us. Many of us are frustrated about having an illness that requires us to enter a hospital in the first place. Our lives are being disrupted just on that level. Many are NOT aware what is exactly going to happen with/to us. It is NOT an exact science and nobody can always predict what is going to take place each step of the way. We may NOT have been in a hospital for many years. The whole experience seems to have all the earmarks of a very frightening time. (It does depend on how much one is frightened by the unknown.)

---Normally and sad to say this, but we are generally a frustrated bunch of people who go about our business, frustrating EACH OTHER...intentionally or unintentionally, along the way, in the normal course of events, ANYWAY! Nobody seems to appreciate what we do. We usually have a certain amount of people ready and willing to remind us of how we're NOT living up to our potential. We are frustrated at having NOT found ourselves! We are frustrated at NOT knowing ourselves! Many don't know what their needs and preferences are and really are NOT quite sure what to ask for to really improve our lives. Instead of building up and rejuvenating one another AND realizing that we are TRUTHFULLY all in this together, we strike out at people and things making things worse for wear in the process. Instead of taking personal responsibility, we BLAME OTHERS for our troubles. We DON'T want the hospital stay to increase FRUSTRATION! BUT...for many, it does!. 

---STILL...all is NOT lost.


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---We are going to speak about KINDNESS, here. We have to give up control at sometime. This may not be an easy thing for some of us to do. It may have been a long time for some of us to be in that boat. Childhood for some of us. Here we are in a hospital bed all alone with strangers caring for us, and, for the most part relying on kindnesses left and right. Many are NOT comfortable with all of this level of trust. It may be too much, too soon. Folks poking, jabbing and invading different parts of ourselves for sometimes long periods. We hope they are all kind, but we really don’t ‘know until we know.‘ Other than feeling ill…we spend much time wishing and hoping this whole ordeal was over so we can get back to our old familiar lives which are looking even better + better…at this point. Any and every bit of TLC is more than welcome.

---If we are unable to pick ourselves up by our bootstraps from this mess and get to know what to do, we may be still able to get the help that we need when necessary. Through this kindness, many things have been set up and help is usually available. Kindness behooves us to partake in its' harvest. If we are overwhelmed by all this...there are many opportunities to find some direction for help and relief in someway that may be more to our liking. 


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---VERY IMPORTANT: Truthfully, the more kindly we approach this...the better it is. Kindness benefits the GIVER and RECEIVER! If you find you’re ‘on the fence,’ KINDNESS IS, ALSO, A PLUS TO THE SEEKER. BEING UNPLEASANT + DEMANDING is NOT a good place to begin. Don't test the kindness of your care partner. He/she is human, also. This is NOT a contest. Don't make it one. We must start taking stock in what we are and what we do. We have to regain who we are. WE HAVE TO BE KIND, OURSELVES. BECAUSE…IT WORKs BETTER WHEN WE ARE!


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---Most folks are stuck with the idea of trying to find a reason to be kind to someone else, or at least certain others. It has to be realized that we have to BE KIND. It is the same dynamic where ’’to have a friend, be a friend.’’ And, the reason is - because it ALL WORKS BETTER THAT WAY. That is the reason. That WILL benefit you, yours and others and EVERYONE!  KINDNESS IS CONTAGIOUS! Kindness, also, leads others to kindness and we have more folks being kind than the original number that we started with. Being kind allows the healing to take place as spoken about above. Conveying an attitude of kindness is easier to work in and much, more therapeutic. Responding kindly to people and things keeps everything light. We don't set up a resistance, NO intense, tenseness that says, ''the truth is that we dislike to even go there.'' In a more friendly environment that is more quick to accept...we find that people don't tend to be as defensive.



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---KINDNESS...however, has taken it on the chin in the last several years. Instead of being kind to one another, we seem to have replaced that with looking out for NUMBER ONE – NUMERO UNO...at the expense of another, in many cases . Generally…we aren't very concerned with the well-being of another, unless, it directly affects how we think we're doing. 

---We have become very suspicious of one another and downright afraid at times. If we increase the knowledge of ourselves we will then increase our awareness. This increase in awareness will translate in being more assured if/when someone is being truthful with us and whether they are being honest or not. We are able to make better decisions and are better equipped to then again live life...and we are more aware to boot. Complacency is unable to come home to roost. Instead, we have a deeper level of kindness and understanding than we did before. The innocence that we seasoned our kindness with at onetime seems to be disappearing. Wariness has replaced it. Maybe we should temper our kindness with a bit more honesty, understanding and intelligence and allow it to strengthen and deepen...naturally.

---Then...we have WELLNESS. To briefly recap, I mentioned that a cut or a wound will heal if it is allowed. Poison Ivy will heal if we (stop scratching) let it. That seems the natural path that all living things take as far as we are concerned. Of course we can interfere with this process and postpone the healing process almost indefinitely by simply picking at the object to be healed. But, for all intents and purposes – the healing process takes place if we let it. OUR UNIVERSE IS SET UP THAT WAY. But...always remember this - if we inflict permanent damage on something, the object will maybe heal with whatever scars we may have done to the original piece. Healing is accepting things as they are and go from there. It doesn't NECESSARILY start where we want and undo all the ruination that we may have brought to it. On a physical level, it may NOT be what we imagine the healing to be. Let us ALL stop this madness and...Be Kind. With KINDNESS, we will truly…Be Well! Remember: it's from FRUSTRATION to WELLNESS via KINDNESS!


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---A DRAFT!

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