---What if I were to begin by telling you that I heard that there was a glitch in the budget and your next paycheck is going to be delayed. The city is sorry, but they plan to get back to you soon and hope to have this whole matter cleared up. It will be soon...so, do the best you can until it's fixed.
---Like most, you were probably counting on that paycheck to take care of something. Every time you inquire about the status of the paycheck you are told it will be soon. Unless you have enough money socked away, there will come a time in the near future when you will begin to really feel the pinch. The money will become a real necessity.
---I think I have made the point that SOON doesn't really cut it. I had a friend in the hospital who was told that the people from a certain church were going to come back soon to see him. This was about 10 am. He started waiting almost right away. At about 11 am he said, ''I wonder where they are?'' It took a few minutes on my part to figure what was going on.
---They had meant that they would come to visit the next time they were in the area. Probably a few weeks from now. The poor guy wanted it to happen right away so he interpreted what they said into an event that would happen right away. This is pretty typical behavior among us humans.
---If you ever had a toothache - relief yesterday, if at all possible, wouldn't be soon enough. If you are the one without the problem, time passes normally. If you have the toothache...each agonizing moment can seem like an eternity. There are many hospital patients who spend a lot of time in that boat. Your understanding of this situation goes up the more you can relate to what I'm saying and have spent time there yourself. Everyone can seem to relate to pain in someway. Even...if only emotionally.
---Most hospital patients have or are dealing with pain in someway. To most patients, time is a bit contorted to begin with.
---The word soon or it's synonyms (directly, shortly, momentarily, right away) are NOT specific and can be downright vague if not followed up. If you're in pain the wait can be something else. In the interest of making things better all the way around, try to BE SPECIFIC and FOLLOW THROUGH! This little word can be the source of much miscommunication between the staff and resident. If attention is paid here and this ''loose end'' was eradicated, both sides would benefit. There would be unity where there once wasn't. Many hospital patients will be very happy you made the adjustment. REMEMBER: NOT SOON...BE SPECIFIC! Be Well.
WHY SAY YES,
WHEN YOU REALLY MEAN NO?
---Sometimes, I find, as a hospital patient, I hear the word ‘YES’ when people really mean ‘NO.' The forgetfulness of the long term patient is legendary. Some resident requests can be outlandish while a well-placed, viable excuse given convincingly enough seems adequate. Both sides need tweaking to make this relationship better.
TO GET RESPECT...YOU HAVE TO GIVE RESPECT!
If you wait to be respected first...it may never happen!
---It is very difficult for a young student nurse to say NO to a patient, at first. Even before it settles in to become what it becomes, a precedent is often set. A patient is so needy…that giving him the world seems to make sense. Everyone learns in this process. Both sides need to be tempered.
---Patients need to come down to reality. Many times the providers could stand a dose of reality, also. It seems an ideal would be a resident and care partner who have a very good working relationship based on much experience of the way that each works. They have a friendship that has developed from working together.
---In a relationship that has the care partner saying YES when he really means NO, we usually find resentment, seething below the surface ready to erupt at anytime. And usually erupts at a time that doesn’t fit the present situation that it happens. It becomes more like the straw that broke the camels back.
---If problems don’t exist and everyone is happy - NO PROBLEM! If problems exist, it seems that many problems could be avoided if a mutual understanding is reached. The resident and care partner sit down together with the charge nurse and discuss the situation honestly. The resident/patient basically states what he expects and needs from the other. The care partner is honest about his willingness and ability to provide it. NO SURPRISES. We don’t have the charge nurse present to impress her with an ideal of sorts that neither player in the partnership plans on keeping. You come to an agreement based on reality and honesty…that will optimize any objectives both sides may have for the other. We want the relationship to be functional…NOT dysfunctional. We want it to work…and work well! Take Care!
This is a draft and will, probably, be tweaked!