A CHRISTMAS CAROL by CHARLES DICKENS

 

A CHRISTMAS CAROL

by

CHARLES DICKENS

A CHRISTMAS CAROL -

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An enjoyable read /listen for The NEW YEAR

As Tiny Tim Says, 

''Bless Us ALL...EVERYONE!''

THE TRAUMAS OF EBENEZER SCROOGE

 A CHRISTMAS CAROL

‘’The TRAUMAS of EBENEZER SCROOGE’’

—SCROOGE is shown traumatic events in his life that succeeded in wearing him down to be as miserly as he has come to be. His former partner, Jacob Marley - now deceased, comes back to tell Scrooge to change his ways before it is too late. The chains that Marley wears in death were woven by Marley, himself, when he treated people as he did during his life. The lessons he learned in life were more about succeeding monetarily at the expense of his fellow man. He never learned that his real business was Mankind, itself. Their common welfare should have been his primary concern. Instead he chose to treat people poorly and make as much money as possible off of those in need. Much the same fate awaits EBENEZER SCROOGE if he doesn’t change.

—Spirit of CHRISTMAS PAST. Not long past, but Scrooge’s past. SCROOGE is brought back to his school days where we learn that Scrooge’s sister Fan died giving life to his nephew. Scrooge’s mother, also, died giving him, SCROOGE, life. His father never forgave him for that.

—He is next brought to a Christmas Party in the early days of the place he works thrown by former employer Mr. Fezzywig, Scrooge hears himself say, ‘’Not a kinder man than he was there any. He brought much happiness to many people.’’

—He next sees himself with the girl he loves and hence marries. He finds he is divorced by his wife after a time when he is told he has become much colder and crueler over the years. She notes how he has changed in the way he treats people through his scorn for the poor and needy. She relates to them having been one herself much of her life. Love has gone from his heart. He once said he loved his wife because she was poor, but grows less loving to the poor. His business grows as the poor get poorer. He thinks debtors prison is where people belong who borrow beyond their ability to payback.

—He is brought back to the death of his sister Fan, where she asks as her dying wish, for Scrooge to care for her son. He doesn’t support his nephew choosing to marry out of love and NOT money. He basically disowned the boy when he showed no concern for the lack of money she had. In his world, money is everything AND love is just a bah humbug! 

—SCROOGE is successful and grows richer in his business, but has become more disrespectful and contemptible as a human being. He is shown this theme time and again by the spirits of Christmas Past, Present and Future. He continues to grow more isolated and colder as the years go forward.

—He can NO LONGER excuse NOR even live with the knowledge of how disdainful he has become. His impassioned journey through time has shown him how uncaring his path has been…and, hence, the error of his ways. He learns that to grow more and more heartless and selfish just doesn’t work and never will. To get back to the land of the living will require him to once again treat people better and to open up the part of him that became closed over the years.

—We realize that we ALL relate to this story in some way or other. It is a story about how helping others far outweighs living a life of gathering riches at the expense of others. We can see that if we all were like EBENEZER SCROOGE before his transformation, it wouldn’t work for too long at all. Having seen the error of his ways AND making the proper changes, rejoining society reshapes his personality to be one of generosity and joy. EBENEZER SCROOGE is now a very happy man.

SCROOGE - CHARLES DICKENS (1951)

ALASTAIR SIM

''A Christmas Carol''

 , T

''CAROL DWECK CREDITs EBENEZER SCROOGE''

---I’m sure that we are all familiar with this story by Charles Dickens. We have the penny pinching Ebenezer Scrooge having very little spirit or love in his heart. He thinks that debtors prison is a good enough place for those who can’t payback loans. He sees death as a way to deal with the surplus population. He is really concerned having less people on the surface (of the Earth) to deal with.

---The night is Christmas Eve. He is visited by the ghost of Jacob Marley, who was once his business partner. Marley warns Scrooge of his miserly ways and how he will regret them in the afterlife. He, also, speaks of three ghosts who will visit Scrooge this night.

---The three ghosts visit named Christmas past, present and future. They take him through periods of his life. It is revealed how Scrooge's miserliness took shape and strengthened overtime. BUT…lo and behold he saw the pain and suffering that he caused over the years, also. This was increasingly painful for him to endure watching.

---He has a change of heart. Scrooge learns a very valuable life-lesson through all this. He asks his nephews wife,''can you forgive a doddering old fool who refused to see?'' He realizes that mending his ways and being more other-oriented Is far more the way to be. He changes from his penny pinching demeanor to loving others and sharing his wealth. He has now opened his heart and you can see the joy and happiness abound. Though this story is quite well known, it is worth another reading or viewing by those so inclined. Be Well.

~~~~~~~~~

A CHRISTMAS CAROL

The THEME

---I’d like to share a theme that I see very often. It is the idea of going from selfish to selfless. I think that you have encountered this many times before…though it may NOT have been recognized.

---The famous book - Silas Marner has it. Old Silas was a miser who’d bury his money until LOVE came into his life in the form of a baby to care for left at his door. A Christmas Carol has the old miser Scrooge penny-pinching his way through life until he sees the error in that lifestyle.

---A baby going through the ‘’terrible two’s’’ encounters much the same. Actually, all rites-of-passage are for this - developing and transitioning into the next phase. If he goes through it properly and develops normally his life will be one of caring and sharing. If NOT a smooth journey than one may get ‘’stuck’’ and find it downright difficult to share. He doesn’t transition from the ‘’me’’ vs. ‘’you’’ to an ‘’us’’ space, easily. He gets stuck in getting his me space satisfied. He is still very self-oriented.

---The downside of this is that he never feels satisfied and never knows when he has had enough. The ‘’ideal’’ would be… ‘’me’’ vs. ‘’you’’ smoothly becoming an ‘’us’’ space. If this doesn’t happen, he is always trying to justify himself as a me. Unfortunately, one is a prime candidate for addiction - trying in vain to fill this emptiness by whatever seems to work. It is usually a ‘’feel good’’ distractor making false promises ’’to fill the void, but never does.’’ Ideally, folks go from me, me, me to us, us, us. When LOVE + KINDNESS of some sort comes into it, the transition occurs. When this doesn’t happen is when we continue the heartaches (the same-old, same-old.) .

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''SCROOGE'' has found his GREATNESS within. If we give up our self centered ways and become selfless, ''putting others first,'' we will find ourselves having an experience of our own greatness. Though this was written by Charles Dickens many years ago, we find the truth stands the test of time. ''FINDING JOE'' (below) plays into this THEME very much. Scrooge has discovered the Golden Buddha within himself (love and generosity.) We ALL have the Golden Buddha within ourselves. Watch the beginning of ''FINDING JOE.'' You should see the similarities that we ALL share within. It doesn't matter who you are or what you have done, it exists inside of us all. The difference is the amount of ''crap'' we have in the way that interferes with our seeing it. If you spend or spent your life helping others, then it shouldn't take long at all. If we have spent our time treating others badly, the time to discover the wonders contained within, The Golden Buddha, will take longer. Be kind to one another, it makes a big difference.

ENJOY!

HAPPY HOLIDAYS

14 SIGNS YOU ARE MENTALLY STRONGER THAN MOST PEOPLE

GOOD TIPS TO LIVING YOUR LIVES!

SUGGESTS AN IDEAL THAT MAY BE A GOOD GOAL FOR ONES OWN LIFE!

 

WITNESSING KINDNESS!

WITNESSING KINDNESS

 ---I'm sure we all have heard the expressions that it is ''nice to be nice'' and ''there is a lot of power in kindness''...but, were you aware that science is finding that anyone who witnesses an act of kindness – benefits, also. His body chemistry improves when he takes notice of kindness happening. They are calling this warm feeling a ''moral elevation.''

---If you think back to a time when something kind was happening in your presence...you can, probably, relate. Scientists are also finding that folks tend to ACT more kindly when witnessing kindness. They are seeing niceness to be contagious in this way.

---If we act kindly toward someone we usually find that is the way they respond. The Golden Rule is in motion and we see that folks generally treat us much like we treat them. Watch how dogs act around you. We more or less get what we give. Be kind, but, also, be intelligent. Don't be someone's doormat. If we are being kind, BUT...realize that that is being driven by an ulterior motive that we have, that will eventually breakdown. That is why it is so important to have a handle on how we, ourselves, operate.

---Knowing ourselves and our motivations and being honest with it all will, probably, provide us with quality relationships for a longtime. In the same vein, if we are playing games with people's feelings, we are probably watching ours being stomped on, too. Be KIND, Be HONEST and Be INTELLIGENT! Eventually we'll be witnessing kindness, again. The world sure seems in need of some. It is up to us to put it there. Be Well!

BE KIND - It can't help but come back to you!

HOSPITAL NOISE

 CREATING QUIET HOSPITAL ENVIRONMENT - PATIENT EXPERIENCE!

---A seven page study on the noise at a hospital. I think that reading it without my input would be beneficial. I have spent a great deal of time in a hospital.  My opinion may easily reflect that held by Florence Nightingale.

ATTACHMENT THEORY - HOW YOUR CHILDHOOD SHAPES YOU!

 

---It Seems To Support The Fact That Being DEPRIVED of Being Valued and Appreciated Early On Has Negative Ramifications Later In Life.

STAY POSITIVE

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Mayo Clinic Transform 2015 - Nadine Burke Harris, M.D.

I THINK THIS IS A VERY IMPORTANT TALK. THE DATA DR. HARRIS SPEAKS ABOUT SPEAKS DIRECTLY TO US AS A HOSPITAL ON THE PHYSICAL and PSYCHOLOGICAL LEVEL.

Simon Sinek: CHANGE YOUR FUTURE - Life Changing Motivational Speech

5 Meaningful Tips That Simon Sinek Has Learned Over The Years.

''GIVE ME THE SIMPLE LIFE'' = SELF-ACCEPTANCE - AN EXPLANATION!

How Everything Works Together!

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---To look a little closer at why both statements are true...we must see the importance of self-acceptance. We find this is one of the biggest stumbling blocks that we have. We must know and accept ourselves - AS WE ARE. If we don't do this, we find we are continually trying to know and accept ourselves. Until we do...everything that we do has us wonder if we are GOOD ENOUGH...in some sense?

[IMPORTANT: We don't wait until we think we are PERFECT to accept ourselves. ACCEPT YOURSELF w/ SO-CALLED FLAWS + ALL. Eventually we stop playing this game of wondering if we are perfect or not?]

---Our GIFT is exposed in the answer we give to the above question. If one knows and accepts himself then...the above answer is YES. He will have NO trouble finding his gift. That will be who he is. If he is NOT convinced that it is okay to be himself, then he will answer the above question in the negative. He doesn't know or realize that HIS GIFT IS HIMSELF. It is IMPORTANT to know that EVERYONE REALIZES THEY ARE GOOD ENOUGH!

---ONE finds that to ''give it away'' is this – to help others find who they are? PEOPLE ARE THEIR OWN GIFT! Everything that we need to know is contained within. We in someway teach others that to be who they are answers whatever question about themselves that they may have. We teach others by us being who we are. We give it away in the sense that we help others find who they are...AND, KNOW THAT THE 'BEST' THEY CAN BE IS - TO BE THEMSELVES! You have given away the knowledge that YOUR GIFT IS YOURSELF.

THE PARADOX IS – YOU EITHER REALLY KNOW THIS or YOU DON'T!

---To summarize – if one fully knows that he is good enough...then he will have already 'accepted himself.' He will progress further. He will realize that MAN IS HIS OWN GIFT. By optimizing who he is (reaching his own potential OR  actualizing who he is) he WILL know that he is on course. Otherwise, he won't. Be Well.

The irony of all this is - it either sounds like a jumble of words to you OR it doesn't.

The SINGING ANIMALS

''BOY! Instincts + DNA...huh?''

FROM A FEW YEARS AGO!

YOUR IDT or RESIDENT CARE TEAM or RESIDENT CARE CONFERENCE

 

Resident Care Team

IDT

---Here is a picture of ''Your Care Team,'' [IDT], or ''Interdisciplinary Team.'' The team is made up of physicians, nurses, dietitians, activity therapists and other staff. As far as your stay in Laguna Honda Hospital I feel this is the best way to optimize your time while here. It is where the rubber meets the road. Your Care Plan will be developed for you based on your clinical's team assessment of you.

---Your needs + preferences are taken into consideration along with the list of medical needs with which you present. You are allegedly residing in a unit that best meets your clinical needs. Your active participation with your care planning is encouraged, valued and will help make your care plan more effective. Your family or other relations involved in making decisions regarding your care if you have that need, called surrogate decision makers, may also contribute to your care planning. You or you and your surrogate will be notified by your social worker of all quarterly team meetings.

---Your Care Team will meet with you regularly to evaluate your appropriate level of skilled nursing care and clerical needs. If the assigned Care Unit is no longer the optimal place to address your needs, you may be relocated to a more appropriate unit. Your cooperation and input within this process is greatly appreciated.

---I always thought that the following would be a huge-plus to the care of the patient. That would be if someone from your Care Team was assigned to be your ''Go -To'' person. He or she will meet with you on a regular basis until no longer necessary, especially as you begin your stay at LHH. He/she will answer questions and help to orient you to your new surroundings and to keep the tenets of your last Care Team Conference (provided you had one,) going. He or she will keep  your next RCC fresh in your mind. He or she jots down requests or questions that you may have over the course of the three months whose answer needs to come from your Care Team. He or she is responsible for ''how things are going for you...on the unit (and the hospital) overall.'' The ''Go -To'' person is NOT in place as I think it should be.

ORIGINALLY WRITTEN IN OLD HOSPITAL

THE BETTER THE CARE TEAM KNOWS YOU or THE BETTER YOU KNOW THE CARE TEAM, THE BETTER THE RESULTS.

THE BETTER ONE KNOWS HIM/HER SELF, THE BETTER HE/SHE WILL DO IN LIFE!

MASLOW'S HIERARCHY of NEEDS

 Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs

Maslow’s hierarchy of needs is a theory that was proposed by psychologist Abraham Maslow in a 1943 paper titled A Theory of Human Motivation. The theory describes, in five stages, what he believed to be necessary for human subsistence and satisfaction.

THE FIVE STAGES

Maslow’s hierarchy is intended to track growth and development in human beings, beginning with infants, who aim to have only their most basic needs met. Typically, people reach different stages of the hierarchy throughout life, and at different times they might experience a deficit in a certain stage. When this occurs, a person will often temporarily abandon pursuit of a higher stage in order to have the more fundamental needs met. However, not all adult humans reach the top of the hierarchy, and poverty, illness, and other factors can interfere with a person’s development in Maslow’s hierarchy.

People who have not had their needs met in one area might also have their needs from another stage sufficiently met. For example, a person in poor health who has little financial security may be part of a community, have an intimate partner, and maintain close relationships with family and friends. Thus, the person’s safety needs are not adequately met, but community and belonging needs are. One might also have every fundamental need met but suddenly experience a threat to safety and shelter. In order to maintain this essential of survival, that person may then leave off pursuit of esteem or belonging needs until the threat to safety passes.

Maslow’s hierarchy originally contained five stages:

Physiological needs: These are the needs necessary to maintain life: oxygen, food, and water. These basic needs are required by all animals and are the primary focus of infants.

1. Safety needs: When an individual’s physiological needs are met, the focus typically shifts to safety needs, which may include health, freedom from war, and financial security.

2. Community and belonging: If safety and physiological needs are met, a person will focus on the need for a community and love. These needs are typically met by friends, family, and romantic partners.

3. Esteem: Esteem is necessary for self-actualization, and a person may work to achieve esteem once needs for love and a sense of belonging are met. Self-confidence and acceptance from others are important components of this need.

4. Self-actualization: Self-actualization is the ability to meet one’s true potential, and the necessary components of self-actualization vary from person to person. A scientist may be self-actualized when able to complete research in a chosen field. A father might be self-actualized when able to competently care for his children.

Between esteem and self-actualization, Maslow later added cognitive and aesthetic needs, which refer to what he considered the needs of academics and artists, respectively.

Viktor Frankl, a prominent 20th century psychologist and the founder of logotherapy, later added self-transcendence as a final stage in Maslow’s hierarchy, bringing the total number of stages to eight. This level concerns an individual’s ability to experience spirituality and relate to the larger universe.

MASLOW’S HIERARCHY AND MENTAL WELL-BEING

Maslow argued that the failure to have needs met at various stages of the hierarchy could lead to illness, particularly psychiatric illness or mental health issues. Individuals whose physiological needs are not met may die or become extremely ill. When safety needs are not met, posttraumatic stress may occur. Individuals who do not feel love or belonging may experience depression or anxiety. Lack of esteem or the inability to self-actualize may also contribute to depression and anxiety.

References:

1. Huitt, W. (2007). Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Educational Psychology Interactive. Valdosta, GA: Valdosta State University. Retrieved from http://www.edpsycinteractive.org/topics/regsys/maslow.html

2. Martin, D., & Joomis, K. (2007). Building teachers: A constructivist approach to introducing education. Belmont, CA: Thomson/Wadsworth.

3. Maslow’s Hierarchy. (n.d.). Retrieved from http://changingminds.org/explanations/needs/maslow.htm

IMPORTANT: REAL NEEDS BEING MET!

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The EMOTIONAL LIFE OF YOUR BRAIN

The EMOTIONAL LIFE OF YOUR BRAIN (COMPLETE)

RICHARD DAVIDSON

BOOK

 

You Can't Simply Take Trauma Away | Dr. Nadine Burke Harris | Google Zei...

I, PERSONALLY, THINK THAT WHAT DR. HARRIS IS PROMOTING IS VERY IMPORTANT. I MYSELF CAME UPON THE ACES RECENTLY and FOUND IT TO BE A  MISSING PUZZLE PIECE IN MY OWN RESEARCH.

I FOUND THAT MY OWN RESPONSE TO LIFE, THAT IS SHARED BY OTHERS, IS TO AVOID FACING THINGS ABOUT YOURSELF THAT ARE TOO UNCOMFORTABLE. IT WAS EASIER TO INVOLVE MYSELF IN SOMETHING ELSE. I WAS BORN WITH ONE HAND MISSING FINGERS ON MY LEFT-HAND, BUT TRIED TO PUT IT IN THE OUT OF SIGHT, OUT OF MIND CATEGORY. BUT, UNTIL I FACED THE REALITY OF THE SITUATION, THAT'S WHEN THINGS STARTED HAPPENING.

WE HAVE SPOKEN OF HOW OUR GREATNESS RESIDES WITHIN, THE GOLDEN BUDDHA, REAL SELF, ETC., WE BLOCK THESE THINGS FROM COMING OUT. MANY TIMES PEOPLE ARE EMBARRASSED TO BE VULNERABLE. WE SHOULD BEGIN BY BEING KIND TO EACH OTHER AND NOT LAUGH AT ONE ANOTHER, TO ALLOW THE GREATNESS WITHIN (THAT MAY BE A LITTLE VULNERABLE AT FIRST) TO FEEL WELCOME AS IT APPEARS. POSING THAT YOU'RE STRONG MAY WORK IN THE SHORTRUN, BUT DOESN'T LAST. BEING REAL and AUTHENTIC IS A MUCH, MORE LASTING QUALITY.

BEING YOURSELF, SO-CALLED FAULTS AND ALL, WILL REAP BENEFITS BEYOND YOUR WILDEST DREAMS. TO INCREASE YOUR TOUGHNESS, LEARN TO FACE THOSE THINGS THAT EMBARRASS YOU. MAKING MISTAKES IS HOW WE LEARN. 

LEARN TO ACCEPT ONE ANOTHER and JUST DON'T TOLERATE EACH OTHER. MOST PEOPLE NEED YOUR KINDNESS and NOT YOUR ABILITY TO LAUGH AT THEM. THERE IS NOTHING GREATER THAN TO HAVE SOMEONE BE SUBSTANTIALLY BETTER-OFF, BECAUSE OF SOMETHING YOU'VE DONE.

SHARE HONESTLY WITH ONE ANOTHER!

ACES OF TRAUMA

 DOWNGRADE THE LEVEL (AFTERMATH) OF THE STORM (TRAUMA) THAT SWEPT THROUGH YOUR CHILDHOOD!

---There exists a tool that helps folks understand why they feel as they do and why they act as they do. This tool consists of answering a set of questions that yields answers that allows trained individuals to predict what diseases they are heading toward based on the different traumas we may have had in our childhood.

What are the 9 ACES - adverse childhood experiences?

In the Minnesota BRFSS survey, respondents were asked if they had experienced any of the following nine types of ACEs: physical abuse, sexual abuse, emotional abuse, mental illness of a household member, problematic drinking or alcoholism of a household member, illegal street or prescription drug use by a household member.

---Some people have had such horrendous things happen to them that a child who experienced such depravity and negativity in their lives has it is compared to PTSD and spending time in combat never knowing any peace always high-strung and anxious ready for the second shoe to drop at any moment. They can be easily triggered and transported to a time when they were actually in a situation where these anxieties were a reality.

---Not everyone experienced this kind of negativity. It is realized that mostly everyone has had something or other that was traumatic in someway. We all have something we'd rather not have been through, but when we come out the other-side we realize that we learned a lot of valuable things in the process. It sort of makes the whole thing worthwhile.

---Acceptance plays a big part in this, but is more a goal of the process and nothing to worry about near the beginning. That is one of those things that we are never sure we've surpassed until that day arises when we realize we are NO LONGER stuck in that cycle.

---Did you ever wonder why some people do better than other people. Did you ever wonder why some folks seem to rise up against all odds and kind of ‘get it’ while others do not. Are you curious to find out what some people are seeing while others don’t seem to have a clue. They have been able to forgive and accept where at other times, seemed impossible. If we watch television at all, we don’t have to go far to be told that the only real limits set on us are the ones that we put there. There is really no one to blame but ourselves!?!? We are holding on to the pain instead of forgiving and allowing the acceptance to come in. Don't Fault Yourselves Because of This. You Might NOT Be Quite Ready...YET! Someday You Will...but, NOT YET! REMEMBER: That's The Goal...NOT The Reality as of YET!

---Are we being lied to for the umpteenth time. Are we being handed another bill of goods that won’t work? We have heard it all before. It just sounds like another bunch of bull. The answer is NO, to that!

---There are ways to escape or at least manage the traumas we experienced in our childhoods. It shows how the kinds of things that happened early in our lives are probably still doing a number on us years or even decades later. Why are we still victims all these years later. What happened happened...whatever that was. Are we still under that spell that fueled the ship many years ago OR are we ready to take a good look at that fuel and make changes to upgrade where necessary? Are we ready to use some of the new technologies to bring us from the dark ages into a light that more and more are seeing and experiencing daily...making REAL CHANGES that last and don’t seem to fade, along the way.

https://michaelgquirke.com/what-are-the-10-aces-of-trauma-how-can-you-begin-to-face-them/

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MANY PLACES TO RESEARCH!

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